Archive for Corporate Idiots

Snow, Concorde and BAA

Posted in And thus the Mystery was solved Watson!, Posts that are far longer than I first intended, Rantings, Your cut-out-and-keep Guide with tags , , , , , , , , , on December 23, 2010 by awickerman

So BAA has apparently refused to let untrained (and un-security checked) people amble about it’s airport cleaning up snow.

Can I suggest that this recent event may have concentrated minds at BAA, Continental getting a large fine (and staff getting a suspended sentence) is a timely reminder that very small bits of debris can bring down a plane. If the hordes of random staff bugger up the cleaning, maybe leaving tools on the ground or missing patches of black ice, and a plane subsequently falls out of the sky (or fails to take off) then it doesn’t take much imagination to see BAA in the dock and facing corporate manslaughter.

If I were BAA, running at 99% capacity most of the time and with a queue of airlines looking for landing slots longer than the runway, I’d not risk prison to get the airport open. It’s not like Lufthansa or any of the other whinging airlines are going to relocate to Luton is it?

Just to make it clear though, they are a bunch of inept idiots who really, really shouldn’t be allowed to run a major airport. But then what do you expect from Spaniards?

The Entrails are Wrong. As usual.

Posted in Alas the Mystery Remains Holmes, Even Stevie Wonder Saw That Coming, Tunnels with tags , , , , , , on May 13, 2010 by awickerman

Today the High Priests of my employer descended from the boardroom to dispense their wisdom, the augurs had been consulted and the news was bad. The new Conservative-Liberal coalition government was a terrible result for the company and would end badly for everyone.

The reasoning appeared to be that a Labour government would have been good for the firm as they would have continued borrowing money the country couldn’t afford and spending it like it was going out of fashion. That this would lead to national bankruptcy and general misery was ignored by our economic soothsayers for reasons I still don’t really understand.

On the other hand the entrails clearly indicated that David Cameron would undoubtedly slash all infrastructure spending, cancel all spending and we would all be jobless by the end of the year and living in a cardboard box. There was no mention of the Liberals as they were dismissed as frankly irrelevant. (And to be honest, looking at the cabinet posts they got I’m forced to concur)

So what happened today, at almost the exact time the Priests were reciting this prophecy? The new Transport Secretary confirmed CrossRail thus guaranteeing every tunneller in the country a job till 2016 at least. And with High Speed Two also getting heavily promoted there may even be a solid conveyor of mega projects well into the 2020s.

All in all another stunning success for our divine forecasters, the same people who recommended we ‘Go into Property’ and that ‘The Middle East is a booming market’, leading to us ending up with a massive property business in Dubai just before the crash and Dubai bailout. That ended about as well as you’d expect.

What worries me is not that our forecasters are inept, it’s not that we keep employing them, it’s the fact we sell their services to others that scares me. How bad must the competition be?

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